Boardroom. Thirteen advisors on retainer, minutes in Slack.

Small-business decisions get made alone. A real advisory board — an operator, a marketer, a CFO-shaped skeptic arguing with each other — is something a ~30-person events company will never have on retainer. One AI answer isn’t a board; it’s a vibe.

• ◆/board <question> in a restricted channel convenes 4–6 of thirteen personas — the seats most relevant to the question, chosen by a router with hard invariants (a chair always sits; at least one counterweight always argues back).
• ◆A real debate structure — independent critiques first, then a rebuttal round, then minutes: positions, disagreements, and a recommendation.
• ◆Living context, no redeploys — the bot re-reads a team-editable Slack Canvas of business context on every run; the team widens the board’s knowledge by editing a doc.
• ◆Fail-closed security — Slack signature verification plus an allowlist where an empty list authorizes nobody.

• ✓29 network-free unit tests: routing invariants, signature verification, allowlist, minutes format.
• ✓Live verification: a real strategy question returned grounded minutes; a marketing question routed to marketing seats.
• ✓Kill switch in config; the README documents residual risk honestly.

Live. Leadership self-serves a structured second opinion without the founder in the loop — and the board’s knowledge grows by editing a doc, not shipping code.